Down the Rabbit Hole with the LCWR, A Montage

The Leadership Conference for Women Religious recently proclaimed itself "stunned' by the eight page document released by the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith asserting the need for the doctrinally problematic organization to reform.


Hm.  Stunned, eh? I don't know, considering some of the sisters' more seething reactions to the Vatican, it's is clear that tensions between the two groups has been brewing for a long time.

And yet, what troubles me more is the great disparity that emerges when you compare the LCWR's claims about its role in the world, and reality.  Things start to become a too 'down the rabbit hole' once you juxtapose a few LCWR sound bytes with factual information. 

I created this montage of quotes and pictures of from some of the LCWR power players to illustrate what I mean. 

Claim:

"Our role is to live the gospel with those who live on the margins of society. That's all we do."-Sr. Simone Campbell, head of Network,

 As we can see, the very margins of society.

 

Reality:

How much is Sr. Carol Keehan worth to the pro-Obamacare Catholic Health Association? Answer: $962,467 a year salary. (Source)

Claim:

Sister Campbell suggested that her organization's vocal support for President Barack Obama's healthcare bill was behind the slap-down...

The Vatican "clearly got upset that we were effective at communicating our views politically," she said.

 Reality:

(a quick search for "Obama" in the doctrinal assessment issued by the CDF yields a result of: 0 and...

Sr. Campbell expressing confusion over the matter

George Weigel points out that if the Vatican was trying to oppose any sort of nationalized health care system in the United States, it would be "the first European-style welfare-state initiative to which 'the Vatican' has objected in living memory.")

Claim:

"They haven't talked to us, " Sister Campbell (Watch video here).

Reality (and it's presented in more detail in the actual assessment form):  "the CDF appointed Bishop Leonard Blair of Toledo, Ohio, as its delegate to conduct the assessment, which was carried out in 2009 and 2010... While investigating the CDF’s concerns, Bishop Blair engaged in correspondence with the LCWR and reviewed publications prepared by the group as well as by other related organizations." Source.

Claim:

Most sisters spend their lives immersed in the deepest sufferings of our world. They don't just stop by the soup kitchen on Ash Wednesday for a photo op. Some actually live in shelters with homeless women, orphans or the addicted. -Jamie L. Manson, National 'Catholic' Reporter (source)

 Reality: No doubt, the above statement is very true in many cases.  Unfortunately, the following pictures reveal a concurrent, sinister reality having nothing to do with living in solidarity with the homeless, orphans or the addicted:

 

 

Claim:
At the surface level, Religious are being threatened because they have been “upsetting the (patriarchal) order” of the Church as institution in which the hierarchy has its position of power. -Sr. Sarah Schneider who has written a five part mini-essay defending and defining religious life as a prophetic life, not necessarily having anything to do with the Catholic Church .  

Scratching your head, yet?

Reality: (From the Doctrinal Assessment. Again, source.) "Some speakers claim that dissent from the doctrine of the Church is justified as an exercise of the prophetic office. But this is based upon a mistaken understanding of the dynamic of prophecy in the Church....true prophecy is a grace which accompanies the exercise of the responsibilities of the Christian life and ministries within the Church,  regulated and verified by the Church’s faith and teaching office."


Finally, let's look at some images from the LCWR's website:
Exhibit A:
First of all, I'm pretty sure that those sweeping arm motions and dancing moves in the image are not really feasible for a demographic for whom there are more members over ninety years old that there are younger than sixty.

 
This seems more realistic:








Exhibit B:

 What is wrong with the traditional ideas of religious life?  Sydney Poitier learned a thing or two from it:

It's all about The Lilies of the Fields, people.

 And lastly, what sort of gospel values do you espouse when this is one of the speakers for your major conference?
Exhibit E=mc squared, an LCWR keynote speaker

Um....

Don't get me wrong, I hope they reform, because this rabbit hole is just too trippy for me!

Let's Talk About Shopping

To my fellow, holy, Catholic, and apostolic family women; you who are my inspiration, my glue to the Faith in many, many moments.  You bright stars, hidden gems in our Lord’s crown, you moms who do everything for everyone around you; yes, you…

Can we talk about clothes for a minute?

We all love modesty, and we’re all moms.  We’re used to ‘putting ourselves last.’ We’re all for shielding our kids from the vanities of the world, guarding their purity of heart, as well as rejecting worldly standards of beauty…

But when was the last time we went shopping for ourselves?

Call me superficial, but hopefully we can all agree that a bit of put-togetherness and a touch of conformity to current trends never hurt anyone.  And that’s my nice way of saying that, frankly, some of us are still wearing things that we should have torched three years ago (which was also the last time we took ourselves out for a professional haircut).

But when do I have the time to shop for myself or get a swanky new hairstyle? If you frequently ask yourself this question and believe that finding the time is impossible, I’m writing to reassure you that it is possible.  

The universal obstacle to taking care of ourselves, of course, is just that: time.  Everyone needs time to scout around and see what styles interest them, to weed through old clothes and try new things on.  And, of course, time is what we feel most guilty giving ourselves, since most of us view giving our needs attention as ‘taking away’ from more important things.

Well, stop it.  We deserve to give ourselves some personal consideration too.

And the truth is, as godly women, don't think for a second that how we look doesn't or shouldn't affect how others perceive the Faith.  The truth is, the impression we send to others through our dress matters, even in the realm of attracting others to the faith.

What do I mean? In some ways it's just common sense.  When I’ve encountered someone at Church who wears expensive clothes and only carries designer purses, I’ve often wondered how effective the faith is in their lives if they continuously spend money imprudently.  By the same token, those that don't seem to bother with looking nice at all, or who adhere to a dress code of frumpy clothes have cause me to question how positively transformative faith actually is if that person appears to lack the self esteem to look nice in public.

While we should never base our feelings of self worth, or our standard of beauty on every new trend, either extreme I just mentioned risks erecting an obstacle to faith in others.  As unfortunate as it may be, our clothes do send the message to the world that we Catholics have either arrived at a healthy balance between being 'in the world and not of it,' or that we're as self-absorbed as ever.

And this can cause division, even amongst those within our ranks. 

For years, I dared not venture into the realm of the long-skirt wearing moms section of the parish grounds because I wore jeans .  Based on clothing alone, I judged that I probably had nothing in common with those moms.  Years later, I’ve discovered that I was mostly incorrect in my judgment, thank goodness. But I also discovered something else.

The reason that many of my mom friends wear, shall we say, not so trendy things is this: when do they have the time to go shop?  When, in the midst of giving and giving and giving to their families, can they break away to do anything for themselves? And who, I ask you, deserves it more than they do?

Bottom line, moms need encouragement to get out there and update their overall appearance from time to time, and many of us feel too guilty, or are simply out of practice in asking permission to give ourselves a little attention. If you are a spouse of one such treasure of a woman, encourage her in all charity to do so, and then please help her make it happen. 

And far be it for me to tell another woman how to dress.  I don’t want to sound like I don’t like skirts or handmaid clothes (but, perhaps you should make a rule not to sew until after you’ve educated yourself on what the current styles are).   As a not-so-girlie mom with a very girlie  daughter, I’m learning to appreciate wearing more feminine clothes (and, surprise!, I'm actually enjoying doing so!). 

Now let me address the weight issue. 

As someone who put on enough weight for three pregnancies when I was carrying my son (oh, but he was so plump and perfect when he came out!) and who took two years to lose it, I get how impractical ‘shopping at every weight loss stage’ is.  Don’t do that.  With the exception of a couple of new t-shirts and tank tops, I kept the same gradually disintegrating and loosening wardrobe as I lost the weight. But by the end, my husband was happy to go out and buy me new clothes that made me feel comfortable and pretty.

Finally, in case this manifesto for shopping still strikes you as too vain, and you’d just feel too guilty spending money on yourself, I want to reassure you that it’s never an ungrateful thing to want to improve oneself for the better.

We’re daughters of God and it’s no sin to look the part every now and again.

For proof of this, just look at religious sisters who consider their habits as their ‘wedding dresses’.   They are enrobed and en-scapulared and veiled.  A rope or belt gathers their waists, revealing that they have one.  They look feminine.  They look like they should be wearing that.

How about us?  Do we look like we intentionally tried to put ourselves together in the morning, or like we just haphazardly threw on the same old, un-matching, outdated selection of stuff?  This is just something that, in all prudence, we should ask ourselves every now and again.

I realize that shopping is genuinely intimidating.  Our culture, our personal insecurities, our body types, dressing rooms (shudder) and even other, well-meaning women just don’t help.   Don’t let that discourage you!  Set up a time to get away and shop without the kids or with another encouraging mom, so that you can really focus on what  you feel comfortable in and which is also relatively recent.

Divine Mercy and a Miscarriage

This year I experienced what could be called a most un-self mortifying Lent.

In one respect, at least, it was excusable: in the midst of the season, I learned I was pregnant.  As such, sacred vessel of new life that I was, I mostly felt excited and jovial over the news, instead of the prescribed solemn and penitent.

But that’s not why my Lent was lame.

It was more the fact that, expecting a baby or not,  I only managed to keep my 40 days for life vigil a handful of times and indulged in meat abstinence on Fridays with obscene sushi consumption.  Add to this that I fell asleep twenty minutes into the Passion of the Christ and failed to read more than thirty pages of Pope Benedict’s Jesus of Nazareth: Holy Week: From the Entrance into Jerusalem to the Resurrection and it’s obvious that any dedication to 'subduing one's flesh' or doing something extra and spiritually enriching never rose above ankle level for me.

Ergo, I decided make a Divine Mercy Novena, which begins on Good Friday and ends on Easter Saturday as a way of making up for my general Lenten lethargy.  Where I had failed to enter into the mystery of Christ's cross, I was determined, at the very least, to bring a profound sense of Christ’s resurrection into my heart and home.

And then I had a miscarriage.

But I am getting ahead of myself.  Back to the novena, for a moment.

Almost as soon as I began trekking through the prayers, Easter week started shaping up as a harried, and awful week.  I’ll spare you the details.  Suffice to say, the devil circled nearby all week long to beleaguer the faith out of me (I noticed he did not come around when I wasn’t really making an effort).

But in the backdrop of all of this was the novena.

Everyday a different group of souls (mankind, priests and religious, those separated from the Church, unbelievers, those ignorant of Christ, souls in purgatory, the souls of children, the humble, meek, devout, faithful and, finally, the lukewarm) is prayed for.  Immediately, I was struck by how realistic and practical those ‘divisions’ of souls were.  I say this because everyone falls into one or more of those categories at any given time during their lives (knock on wood for purgatory). 

Like a ‘camino’ of self-discovery, as I prayed for ‘them,’ i.e. the souls that Jesus wants to deliver into his unfathomable mercy, I discovered that I was essentially was praying for myself.   So often I’m the one who is ignorant of who Christ is.  I separate myself from Him and His Church through sin, I become inexcusably lukewarm during key times such as ahem, Lent, for instance.  

But, wait, this novena is about Divine Mercy and not self-loathing!  I also prayed for good, meek and devout souls and for myself as someone who can be faithful, devout and yes, even meek at times. Throughout the novena I could not forget that true humility (as well as mercy) also requires acknowledging our good points and those of others no matter how difficult that is at times.  

I, for one, struggle with understanding God’s mercy, which is probably telling of how I too often fail at extending mercy to others.   The novena deepened my understanding of the goodness of our Lord as the source of inexhaustible mercy.  I also learned that I still have much to learn when it comes to growing in humility and regarding others mercifully.

This Easter, however, I experienced what it means to humbly surrender to His will and trust in His mercy in a very personal way.

On the sixth day of Easter, we learned that our baby had died.

On that very sleepless night, in that cold emergency room, my husband and I cried, held hands, and hugged each other. And yet even in the midst of our loss, we concluded that, in the end, we trusted God.  By grace, we were able to place our trust in His will and plan for us, and to entrust our baby to His loving mercy.

And in the backdrop of all this, still, was the novena, in which the souls of children are particularly prayed for.

Jesus, I trust in you.

On Divine Mercy Sunday, we attended mass. As I gazed at the still fresh Easter lilies surrounding the tabernacle and image of the Divine Mercy that hangs behind the altar, I felt a profound sense of resurrection both for myself and for my little one.  My baby is alive somewhere and one day I hope to meet little him or her in Heaven.   

Yes, it is a saddening thing to lose a child.  There will always be a hole in our hearts for never having known them.  But it’s an equally beautiful thing to experience being immersed with them under the tent of God's hounding mercy and compassion. 

That evening, after mass, we named our baby and I finally a felt splinter of joy in my soul as I left for home with my husband and with the two beautiful children God has blessed me with in this life.

It was the first time all Easter.

“Who indeed is the victor over the world but the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?” 1 Jn 5:5  

A Toddler Explains Hell Using a Guidebook of Italy

The following post recounts a conversation that took place in our household on the Tuesday before Easter Sunday, the Year of our Lord, two thousand and twelve.

Names have not been altered.

In this conversation: Dada the Wise, Abby the Toddler, and Very Italian Uncle "Taco" (toddler for 'Franco').

Abby: Dada, Do you have a sister?

Dada: Yes, Abigail.

Abby: Where is she?

Dada: She’s in Heaven.  

Abby: What’s Heaven?

Dada: It’s where we go when die if we have been good.

Abby:  (thinks about it) Where do you go if you are bad?

Dada: You go to hell.

Abby: What's hell?

Dada: It's where the bad guys live.

Abby: Bad guys?  Well...what do they do?

Dada. They hurt you.

Abby:  Why do they hurt you? 

Dada:  Because that’s what they do.

Abby: (frowns) I don’t want to go there.  I'm going to go to Heaven.

Cute as heck, right?

Later that evening, when Very Italian Uncle Franco, aka "Taco"  comes to visit:

Abby: (holding a guidebook of Italy, reading a 'story' to our visitor)  ...and the Spanish ships invaded Italy.  Oh...Uncle Taco, that’s Hell.

Very Italian Uncle Taco: That's Italy, Abby, not Hell.

Abby: No. That's hell (pointing to something in the guidebook)...

Taco: (looks to where she is pointing) No Abby, that's not Hell.  That's a cathedral...

Abby:  Uncle, that's hell.

Taco: No Abby, that's a church.

Abby: (thinks about it, then points to a picture of a big spider*) Ok…that’s hell.

Taco: The spider?

Abby: Yes.  (she then turns to a map of Sicily)  What's this, Uncle Taco?

Taco: That's Sicily.

Abby:  Sicily?  Ok...that’s Hell.

Taco:  Yes, Abby.  Yes, it is.

(No offense intended to any Sicilians out there!  And if you are unfamiliar with the dynamics between Sicilians and main land Italians, let's just say that Sicilians don't consider themselves Italians, and nor are they considered so by the folks living on the 'boot')!

*Where in Italy are there famous spiders?  Anyone?

5 Stupid Reasons I Resisted Having A Catholic Radio Bumper Sticker on My Car

I heart Catholic radio.  I need it.  I pine for it.  I crave it like it's pure audio mocha (which is probably the closest thing I’m going to get to a real mocha from they-who-shall-not-be-named for a very long time.)

So why did I resist affixing a Catholic radio sticker to my car for so long?

Stupid, stupid, stupid reasons, which nevertheless, effectively stopped me from announcing my devotion to my beloved Immaculate Heart Radio to everyone on the road.

Someone, anyone, please tell me that you can relate and that I am not alone:

1. A bias against bumper stickers in general.

Bumper stickers are reductionism at its most grotesque.  Some egotistical blowhard’s attempt to bludgeon other drivers with their own beliefs. I felt this way even before Catholic radio came to town.

You see, I live in the Bay Area.  As I describe it to people out of state: near San Francisco (where the Church is really popular) Berkeley (where shoes and shaving are illegal) and Santa Cruz (which has outlawed taking showers, but their awesome mountain bikes kind of make up for this). So you can imagine how many times I have had to swallow my own upchuck when I've come across “I Voted for Kerry” “Coexist” "Go Vegan" and “Arms are for Hugging” (get it?).

People put this on their car.

To be asked to be another bumper sticker out there, even though I heartily believe in the mission of Catholic radio, still feels like someone is asking me to wear a garment made out of tie-dyed tree bark that my kids have finger painted all over.

And yet, I admit, that every time a car with a Catholic radio sticker passes me on the road, I actually do become hopeful knowing that someone out there shares my Catholic values (which, I guess, would be the antithesis of the ones I just mentioned… “not Kerry,” “Divide and Conquer,” "Steak..."and “Hug my leeettle friend, Mutha…”).

In other words, I’m genuinely encouraged when I see one.  How great is that?  And how silly is it that I resisted doing the same for others for so long?

2 - 4. I would feel guilted into obeying the rules of the road, driving politely, and I would cause scandal to others and the Church if I failed to do so.

I reasoned that having a Catholic radio sticker on my car would be the automobile equivalent to having one of those Jesus portraits where the eyes follow you.  I would feel it staring at me. All of the time. The bumper sticker, that is.  

It would also 'ping' God every time I drove slightly above the limit in school zones and didn’t make complete stops at stop signs.  And each time, my status in heaven would decrease half a wrung (though I doubt its ever been higher than ‘maintenance staff’ anyway).  You get it – I would feel so stressed at the very thought of driving and being good at the same time that I wouldn't make it out of the house.

Which was also the basis for my third reservation: I’d have to be a polite driver all of the time.  Right now you're thinking, "But, aren't you supposed to be this way anyway?"  To which I say, "Yes.  But have you ever driven in California?"  ( I confess that this is my usual rationale for forgoing traffic etiquette).  

Should I dare creep up close behind a slowpoke (i.e. impolitely pressure the slug in front of me to actually drive the speed limit), I could just imagine the other drivers sniggering when they saw that it was a Catholic radio listener doing so. “Oh, so that’s how a Catholic drives?”   “Looks like the Immaculate Heart really hasn’t done that gal any good,” “Ghandi was right about Christians,” etc. But if they didn't know which station I listened to, I didn’t have to worry about all of this, you see?

And this fed into my fourth reason for not displaying a Catholic radio a bumper sticker. “What if I do get pulled over?" I worried, "What will people think of me?  What will they think of the Church?”  Better not risk giving scandal to anyone which meant no bumper sticker, of course.  What a chicken.

And here’s my stupidest one of all:

5.) I don’t want the other van driving, homeschooling moms to think I’m trying to fit in. 

Because my massive van, the homeschooling cooperative, the NFP and meeting up with them at daily mass once a week doesn't already make my affiliations obvious.  Pathetic, I know. 

In short, all of my stupid reasons were mostly concerns for my image.  Dear reader, can you ever forgive me?   Immaculate Heart Radio, can you?

I promise the bumper sticker is there now! I promise to make a good pledge this spring (oh wait, is that already over with?) And I promise that I will try to drive more like a Catholic Radio listener should: with the Chaplet of Divine Mercy blaring at red lights, and in the background in drive throughs...

Hey, this gave me an idea!  The Theology of Laundry is now launching its own bumper sticker!  Vote on which one is the best (or worst):

#1 The Theology of Laundry: Because God’s Mercy has a Rinse Cycle!

Or

#2 God <3s Laundry Piles: Read The Theology of Laundry

Or

#3 The Theology of Laundry: WWJD? Fold the Laundry (Jn 20: 6-7)! U Shud 2! 

 (Too much?)